Caregiver tips for holidays

Unfamiliar places, large groups of people, noise, and a hectic pace can bring feelings of anxiety, fatigue, and depression. As a caregiver, this adds to the other challenges you may be facing. For example, you may find that seasonal obligations are pulling you in multiple directions and adding to your stress level.

Finding the time and energy to buy gifts, visit others, and even feel “holiday spirit” can be difficult as the commitments layer on. So how can you make holidays a time to enjoy and connect with family and friends for you and a person living with dementia, multiple sclerosis, or Parkinson’s disease.?

Here are some tips that can help make holidays more enjoyable — for everyone:

Make a simple wish list

To help you manage holiday stress, try to plan as much as you can ahead of time. Creating a list of simple and straightforward goals will allow you to set realistic expectations for yourself and the person you care for, and prioritize the occasions and traditions that are most important to you and your family. Some items to consider include:

• Scheduling your holiday gatherings for dates and times that best suit the person living with dementia, multiple sclerosis, or Parkinson’s disease.
• Letting your family and friends know in advance about your priorities and availability.
• Aiming for as few changes in routine as you reasonably can.
• Ensuring that you are well-supplied to avoid last-minute running around (for example, having extra medication on hand).

It’s also a good idea to make a list of doctors, walk-in clinics and pharmacies that are open during holidays in case of an emergency.

Keep gatherings small and short

Smaller gatherings, with fewer faces to see and conversations to hear, will reduce overwhelming feelings of stress for a person living with dementia, multiple sclerosis, or Parkinson’s disease.

For larger, longer gatherings, consider bringing the person to the most meaningful part of the event, and designate a quiet room where the person can use if needed. Consider choosing familiar and accessible places for gatherings.

Get them involved

Have the person you care for participate in preparations and tasks that have meaning for them.

Are there any holiday activities that bring them joy, like making cards or wrapping gifts? Remember that changing abilities have not altered the person’s importance in the family or the need to be included in special activities and events.

Travelling? Have a plan

Changes in the person’s abilities can make travel challenging, but careful planning can help. If your holiday plans include travel, make as many requests as you can ahead of time, particularly with flights and accommodations. Most airlines have assistance services for those with medical conditions, and can provide special accommodations such as wheelchairs, additional legroom and early boarding.

If staying at a hotel, let the staff know about your needs and explain some of the possible difficulties you might encounter. Long trips can be stressful for you and the person living with dementia, multiple sclerosis, or Parkinson’s disease. So plan ahead and give yourself plenty of extra time to get where you’re going. Pack a few days before you have to leave, and have a doctor’s note for any medication you carry.

Find time for yourself

Be realistic and don’t overdo it — avoiding burnout and finding respite is key to enjoying holidays. Spread your errands around, and don’t feel afraid or guilty to ask for help. Take a look at your network — is there another family member, friend, or a neighbour whom you can ask for help?

Holidays can provide good opportunities to seek support from those you know. If you cannot find support in your personal network, remember that you’re never alone—we’re here to help!

For further reading

• Tips for travelling with someone who has dementia
• Reducing caregiver stress
• Taming Stress in Multiple Sclerosis (PDF)
• Parkinson’s and Travelling (PDF)

Links provided are for informational purposes only, and do not necessarily represent an endorsement by the Alzheimer Society of Canada, MS Society of Canada or Parkinson Canada. Always review treatment options with your health care provider.

This article was last updated on December 15, 2022. If you have any comments, questions or concerns about this article, please email publications@alzheimer.ca.